“Hey, there’s nothing wrong with my taste. You’ve seen that ring that I picked out for Dorothy.”
“Actually, he was going for a bracelet, but the mechanical claw grabbed the ring.”
-Stan and Dorothy
All is not well in the house today. Blanche comes home early after being ditched on a date and rushes to the ice cream. Sophia’s been feeling sick for over a week, and won’t stay put as per her doctor’s orders.
“Now, look, either you’re gonna follow his orders or I’m gonna call him and tell on you.”
“Ooh, what is he gonna do, come over and spank me?”
“If he does, tell him to come by my room.”
-Dorothy, Sophia, and Blanche
Stan shows up at the door with news: he’s getting married, and everyone is invited! The Girls are happy for him, and he shows them a ring he bought for his fiancee, Catherine. It’s not impressive.
“Okay, the diamond’s not very big. Okay, it’s not a real diamond. It’s the thought that counts. Okay, I didn’t put much thought into it. It was cheap, I’m cheap, what can I tell ya?”
-Stan
He agrees to let the Girls help him shop for a better gift the next day, and Rose and Blanche come home satisfied that they’ve done their job well, maybe even spending too much of Stan’s money.
Sophia is cooking and still refusing to stay put. She goes into a coughing fit, and the Girls call the paramedics.
At the hospital, it’s taking forever for anyone to tell the Girls what’s happening with Sophia. Stan shows up, having stopped by the house with concerns about the price of the ring and run into neighbors. As he arrives, so does a doctor, who gives Dorothy bad news: the virus has turned into pneumonia, and the next few hours are critical. He tells her she should go home and wait for news, but she can’t bring herself to leave. Blanche and Rose offer to stay with her, but she wants to be alone.
“Would it be stupid to ask for a group hug?”
“Oh, of course not! Hands above the waist, Stanley.”
-Rose and Dorothy
At one in the morning, Dorothy is still pacing alone in the waiting room when Stan comes to see how everything is going. He’s upset to learn that no one has talked to Dorothy in hours, and hunts down a doctor. When the doctor gets snippy with them, Stan fights back, and demands that the doctor have them updated every hour. The doctor backs down. Dorothy is rightfully impressed. She falls asleep on Stan’s shoulder, and is awakened in the morning by a doctor who tells her Sophia is going to be fine. Stan decides to give them some privacy, and Dorothy thanks him for all he’s done.
Sophia is just about back to her old self by the time Dorothy goes in to see her.
“Ma, the doctor says you’re gonna be just fine.”
“Of course I am. I survived war, disease, and two seasons of Designing Women.”
-Dorothy and Sophia
Blanche and Rose come by to check on everything, as well.
“What about you, Dorothy? You must be exhausted being here by yourself all night.”
“I wasn’t alone. Stan came by and stayed with me. Brought me food, held me, showed me that special part of himself.”
“Right there in the waiting room?”
-Rose and Dorothy
Dorothy tells the Girls she’s still in love with Stan, and can’t let him marry someone else. Sophia is not thrilled.
The night before Stan’s wedding, Rose and Blanche try to talk Dorothy out of ruining it.
“You think I’m terrible because I want my husband back?”
“Ex-husband, Dorothy. Ex-husband who left you and didn’t even have the courtesy to tell you he was leaving. Ex-husband who married someone half your age just one week after the divorce. Ex-husband who’s getting married again tomorrow. I don’t know why you want that man; he’s treated you like dirt! And even that I could overlook if he had a good body.”
-Dorothy and Blanche
Dorothy is unmoved; she’s sure Stan has changed for the better. Blanche and Rose point out that Dorothy was vulnerable at the hospital, and that she doesn’t know if Stan even feels the same way. Somehow, everything they say makes Dorothy even more resolute in her decision to tell Stan she’s in love with him.
“Well, way to go, Rose. You talked her into doing exactly the opposite of what we wanted her to do.”
“I guess that’s why they took me off the suicide hotline at work.”
-Blanche and Rose
Dorothy shows up early to Stan’s wedding, and before she can tell him how she feels, Blanche and Rose show up in hot pursuit, doing all they can to stop her before physically booting her out of Stan’s room. Dorothy heads downstairs to the hotel bar and binges on peanuts. A woman sits next to her, clearly nervous. She says she’s about to get married, but is worried about her fiance’s ex-wife.
“No one’s like her. She’s superwoman. She was the perfect wife. Cooked, cleaned, had two kids, got an education, has never looked better, and now she has a career.”
“That wasn’t a marriage; that’s a commercial for a mini-pad.”
-Catherine and Dorothy
It doesn’t take long for Dorothy to realize that this is Catherine, and she’s truly in love with Stan. Dorothy realizes that she has no right to intrude on their relationship, and is ready to let go.
“Well, it looks like I’ve got a wedding to go to.”
“I’m going to a wedding myself; you mind if I walk with you?”
“Not at all. You know, you’re a very wise person. What did you say your name was?”
“I didn’t.”
“Well, I’ve really enjoyed talking with you. I hope we meet again soon.”
“Oh, believe me. We will.”
-Catherine and Dorothy
High points: Stan standing up to the doctor, Blanche standing up to Dorothy, Rose and Blanche running around Stan’s hotel room in a frenzy, Catherine actually being really lovely.
Things that don’t age well: I can definitely imagine Dorothy getting swept up in her emotions with all this, but I don’t know that I can believe she’d be willing to ruin a wedding on the day of the wedding. She’d at least give Stan a couple of days’ notice.
MVP: Blanche, who is that friend who gives you the real talk you need when you’re about to do something really stupid.
The verdict: I really like seeing the many facets of Dorothy, and this is probably the episode in which Stan is at his best.
Bae Arthur 